Why You Should Stop Chasing Happiness

Chris Albert 00:00:00 (link to this point)

This is Chris Albert, and I'm here to remind you of one thing. Someday, you're going to die. Now that's not some morbid statement or scary idea. It's solid fact. Your time here on this earth is limited.

We need to be reminded of this as much as possible for one simple reason, to live your best life while you can. This is the Warrior Soul Podcast. What is going on ladies and gents? Welcome to this edition of the Warrior Soul Podcast. This is a Warrior Notes edition.

And if you're new to the Warrior Soul Podcast, maybe it's your first episode that you're listening to, maybe you've listened to a couple of episodes and you're still trying to wonder what the heck I'm about. The whole point of this podcast is to empower US military veterans to live their absolute best lives. The reason why I started this podcast is because a few years ago when we first started hearing about veteran suicide, when we first started about hearing about veteran homelessness, sorry I can't talk today guys, we heard a lot of awareness, a lot of people raising awareness about these issues. We heard a lot of people talking about these issues. We saw a lot of entertainment going out there for veterans and we still do it.

I think entertainment and humor are awesome. I think raising awareness is awesome. But here's the thing. What I wanted to do was to create something that presented actual solutions. So when you're listening to one of these shows, my whole goal is to give you something that is going to help you.

It could be a piece of knowledge, could be a strategy, it could be an idea that is going to help you right there and then to do something to improve your life. Maybe it's a mindset change, maybe it's something you go out and do, but whatever it is, it is going to be free all the time and it's going to be something that you can implement. If you have the will, if you have the drive and if you have the desire. So that's what this podcast is about. I do three types of episodes And I publish generally three times a week.

The first type of episode is my most popular. Those are my interviews. That's where I bring somebody on who's generally a lot more accomplished and lot more famous than I am and a lot more knowledgeable. And they come on and I dig into their brain to get them to give you guys advice, right, from their experience. I've had on Robert Greene, the author of the 48 Laws of Power, amazing book, the greatest author of our time.

I've had on Ben Greenfield, the greatest personal trainer in the world, to come on here to talk about how Veterans can optimize their brains and their bodies in their post military life and mitigate the damage that might have been done while they were serving. I brought on Nick Koumalatsos. We had an amazing conversation about transitioning into the civilian world. Nick Koumalatsos is a Marine Corps raider who is now an entrepreneur, and he's absolutely dominating the business world. He's dominating the social media space.

Had on Vincent Rocco Vargas. He's a US Army veteran, US Army Ranger, and he is an actor. You might have seen him on Mayans MC. Had him come on, and we talked about transitioning into the civilian world and and the difficulties you guys face. We get so many great guests here.

We just had on Pat McNamara, former special operator in a myriad of different special operations organizations. He is a coach, a trainer, and he wrote a book called Sentinel that teaches you how to be the agent in charge of your own private security protection detail. Alright? And he's a great, great dude. I definitely suggest you guys go and check all those interviews out.

Whenever we have an interview, definitely check it out because it's gonna be somebody who knows a lot. And then, the other types of episodes I do, I do the ask me anything episodes. Generally I do those less, I'll do those like once or twice a month and those are generally questions that the audience asks me. Not that I know everything, I've just been through a lot, I've failed a lot and because I've failed a lot I can tell you from experience what not to do. Right?

And then we have the Warrior Notes episode and that's what this episode is. This is where I dig into a particular issue and the goal of these is to just give you an idea, you something that's going to get your brain working so that you can pull yourself out of any situation you're in or continue because some of you are out there, you're dominating. It's not all bad for veterans out there. There's a lot of veterans out there who are doing amazing. So it's either to help you get out of a better situation or to continue dominating this life.

And today I want to talk to you about something that I think is a big mistake that people make and they go on these quests to be happy. I'm going to tell you why that's a mistake in a second but first I just want to give you a quick note from our sponsors. First off, F Bomb Nutrition, they make delicious packets of macadamia nut butters. They mix them up with salt sea salt, with pecan butter, with coconut butter. They're so delicious.

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You're going get 20% off your first order. The other one is an organization that's near and dear to my heart and that is Save the Brave. Savethebrave.org they are an amazing five zero one(three) charity for veterans. They create camaraderie events for veterans around the country. They have these awesome deep sea fishing expeditions they take veterans on.

They have these awesome golfing trips they do. And you can hook up with them, like I said, at savethebrave.org. They also do a lot of work with Gold Star families. So definitely get linked in with them. They are an amazing organization and here's the thing, their board doesn't take a salary.

There's very few charities out there like that. So that's why I support them and that's why they're near and dear to my heart. So let's get back to the subject guys. Being happy. Right?

It's a big mistake that a lot of guys make when they get out. Rather than seeking another challenge, than seeking another mission, rather than finding something that's going to be meaningful for them, a lot of veterans choose instead to settle into a life that everybody else tells them is going to make them happy. That everybody else tells them is going to make them happy. Now here's the big thing because it's it's we live in this crazy situation, right? Where we got social media coming at us from all different directions telling us what we should want, right?

There's a lot of social media people out there telling you that you should want to be an entrepreneur or that you should want to do this or that you should want to do that, right? And what I want to avoid doing here is I want to avoid trying to box you into something like that because I'll tell you this, I am an entrepreneur and it is a difficult life. It is a difficult life filled with a lot of struggle and a lot of uncertainty and a lot of people aren't cut out for it. There's a lot of veterans who are particularly cut out for it, right? A lot of veterans make really good entrepreneurs, but I'm not gonna sit here and tell you that hey you need to be an entrepreneur, right?

Because not everybody is cut out for that kind of thing, Right? Some people just want to make a paycheck and I don't see anything wrong with that. But what I do see something wrong with is when you end up doing things just because society tells you to do it. And here's the big thing. When you joined the military, when you joined the Marine Corps, the Army, the Air Force or the Navy, a lot of times that's an act of rebellion.

That's an act of rebellion. And it's an act of rebellion because most of us, our parents don't want us to go. Like there might be some of you out there whose parents were like okay with you going but if you're like me my mom chased me around a broomstick tried to break my leg after I enlisted. Right? There's a lot of us out there for whom joining the military was a decision that we made for ourselves, and it was an act of rebellion.

And that spirit that got you to join the military, that spirit that got you out there to to to do this thing that less than 1% of the entire population does. Well, that doesn't just go away. And it doesn't just go away after four years, right? When you get out, even if you hated every second of being in the military, that thing inside of you, that thing that said go against the grain and take the less traveled path, dude, that is still with you. That is still there.

And if you decide that that that you're not going to scratch that itch anymore, what I'll tell you is this, it's going to catch up with you. It's gonna find you in some way. And when what what happens is this. For a lot of guys, they get out, they get themselves settled, they start taking they start taking a paycheck from a job, they start going to school, they start building a life, and then all of a sudden it hits them. And they look at their lives and they say, you know what?

I'm missing something here. I don't have that that sense of purpose when I wake up in the morning anymore. I don't have that that drive that I once had. I don't have that peer group I once had. And everything I'm doing doesn't seem like it means much to me anymore.

So why do we end up doing that when we get out of the military? Why do we end up going in and settling down and doing what everybody else does or what society tells us to do? Well, we do it because we're human beings. Because that's what human beings do. We have a tendency toward following the group.

And it's that tendency, I think, that really really messes with veterans. And I'll tell you what, if you're a civilian, still listen to this because civilians do this all the time. They make that mistake of doing what society tells them is going to make them happy. So the question in your mind right now then is, what should you do instead? What should you do aside from what society tells you to do?

And and just generally that's either getting out and going to get a secure job. A lot of guys go into contracting positions. That's one thing because they're they're not done with the they're not done with the party so to speak and they wanna keep going with that. And a lot of guys hate that, because it still takes them home and the schedule is brutal. But how do you capture that meaning?

How do you capture that sense of purpose? How do you capture that sense of mission when you're no longer in the military? And this is not an easy answer, right? It's not. And what I can tell you is this: It's got to come from you finding something that's more important than yourself.

Finding something that's more important than yourself. Right? So what that means is this, it doesn't necessarily matter what job it is. It doesn't necessarily matter what the type of work is. If that work, if that job is allowing you to dedicate yourself to something that's greater than you, or that will give you the opportunity in the future to dedicate yourself to something that's greater than you, then that is what you're really looking for.

What you're looking for is meaning. What you're looking for is something that's gonna say, hey, you know what, I'm ready to get up in the morning. I'm ready to go to work. I'm ready to accomplish whatever this mission is. Right?

Now, here's the other part of it. That thing, that thing that brings you meaning. Now, that doesn't necessarily have to be a huge grand idealistic thing, right? It could be something like, hey, I want to provide the absolute best living for my family that I possibly can, right? And so in a lot of ways it's going to be easier for those of you who have kids, for those of you who have families, to find something.

Something that's going to give you meaning because you could find meaning in your kids, you could find meaning in your family. For those of you who are single, those of you who don't have families yet, here's the thing, you have to figure out what that thing is that's going to bring meaning to your life. What that thing is, what that higher purpose is. I know for me, I was looking for it for a really long time. It took me about a decade.

And I, you know, I went to grad school, I thought grad school was going to bring that kind of meaning to me. I thought that maybe I wanted to become a professor, and at the end of the day, I looked around at what was going on in academia and the political climate, and I said to myself, you know what, this isn't going to bring me any meaning. This is just going to ostracize me and put me into a corner, and put me into a place where I am with people who are pretty much against everything I ever stood for. That's So why I got out of academia, that's why I left my PhD program. Right?

And then I found meaning when I started helping other people to get fit. When I started helping other people to get healthy. When I started educating other people about nutrition and ways of improving their lives. I found a lot of meaning from that. And then when I started this podcast, when I started putting this together and started helping veterans and started spreading this knowledge, that really, really brought meaning to my life.

Right? And so every day I wake up, no matter what, I'm psyched to be putting this show together. I'm psyched to be spreading this message. Right? And what I want you guys to understand is that whatever that is for you, it's there.

But it's gonna take you going out there and taking a couple of swings. Right? You might have to do a couple of things that that you really don't like doing. You might have to go out there, you might have to get a job that you really don't like at first. Right?

You might have to go out there and you might have to struggle a little bit. Right? And in fact, you're going to be far more likely to find that thing you're looking for while you're struggling than if things are entirely comfortable. Right? A lot of times you find meaning from the struggle itself.

Right? And and and this is hard to explain. But if you're comfortable, the problem is you're not looking anymore. Right? If you're comfortable, your aim, and when I say comfortable, it doesn't mean you're not working hard.

It doesn't mean it means you're you're coming home at night and you're turning your brain off and you're not putting any more effort into figuring out why you exist here on this earth. Essentially you go on autopilot, you wake up, you go to work, you come home, you eat dinner, you go to sleep. You wake up, come home, eat dinner, you go to sleep. And do that over and over again. You're just putting yourself on autopilot.

And the thing you have to do, if you're gonna find that thing that's gonna bring extra meaning to your life, is you need to get yourself out of autopilot for a little while, and you need to get yourself into a position to where you're actually thinking. You're looking at the world around you. You're keeping your eyes open for people who could use your knowledge, your experience, for people who have problems that you can solve. Right? And again that doesn't have to be through entrepreneurship, it could be jobs, it could be you could be looking at the way law enforcement is going right now.

Maybe you have a contribution to that. Now a lot the military guys do that. Maybe it's not law enforcement, maybe it's something going on in the company you're working at right now. And you're seeing a problem that you could fix. And maybe you are taking the initiative to start to solve that problem on your own before your boss says anything.

And then from there, once you take that initiative, maybe you gain some responsibility out of it. Right? And that's what I'm talking about. Having the awareness to say, you know what, this world is bigger than I am. There's other people in it and there's problems here.

And I am gonna find meaning from solving those problems. Right? And again guys, none of this stuff is easy. Right? It's not as simple as listening to this podcast or, you know, reading a book and then saying, hey, I'm gonna go do that.

The best learning is gonna come from experience. Right? I've screwed up more times than I can count. I've had so many jobs that I hated. I've been a landscaper, a day laborer, construction laborer.

I've been a freaking office boy. I've gone and fetched coffee. I've done so many jobs. I was a truck driver. I did so many different things and I'll tell you right now I have three degrees.

I've got a bachelor's degree, two master's degrees, and I completed doctoral work in political science and I had all those jobs. Right? And so what I'm telling you is not based off of, you know, some platitudes, based off of experience. It's based off of a lot of screwing up. And as an older man, 40 years old, most of you guys are half my age, I can tell you that if you open your eyes, there's a lot of places you can find meaning in this world.

It just takes opening your eyes and it takes the will to take some initiative. So that's my advice for today guys. I hope that makes sense. If it doesn't, please reach out. Please ask me questions.

You can reach out to me at chris@warriorsoulagoge.com or you can feel free to DM me at the Warrior Soul Agoge Instagram account. And you know, we've got tons of resources up here, we've got tons of different places that you can go, different podcasts that you can listen to, to help you with this stuff. So I hope you're doing that. And with that guys, I want to thank you so much for listening. We're gonna be back at you later on this week with some awesome content.

This is Chris Albert with the Warrior Soul Podcast and I am out.